Monday, February 25, 2008

Putting the "Man" in Manatee

You know, I love a man in uniform as much as the next red-blooded American woman, but the latest marketing scheme by the Florida Marlins’ baseball team doesn’t appeal to me at all.

Apparently in an effort to attract people to the ballpark this summer, someone within the Marlins' organization—in a moment of brilliance—wondered what would be more crowd pleasing than a bunch of overweight men shakin’ more than what their mama gave ‘em? Better still, let’s call ‘em like we see ‘em. What lurks around Florida, moving at the speed of an obese beer belly on its way up to the bar? A Manatee!

That’s right. This spring, the Manatees will dance and groove out at the ballpark for the delight of all who come to watch professional athletes play baseball. And to think someone thought this would help attendance. What would people think if the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders were suddenly replaced by plus-sized women? Surely that would be a marketing trick, right? If men aren’t necessarily inspired by overweight women dancing around, then who is going to want to see hefty men get low, low, low, low, low…? Are these men so desperate for attention—not to mention free admission to the games, which is their total compensation—that they will allow themselves to be humiliated in public?

I guess if you watch enough reality TV, you come to realize that people will do just about anything for a moment in the spotlight. I’m just wondering if they’ll limit how much these guys practice during Spring Training. If they dance and work out to get ready for opening day, then maybe the joke will be on the Marlins’ marketing folks. I’m willing to bet their plus-size cheerleading uniforms might get too loose, and then all you have left are a bunch of average Joes with moderate dancing skills, trying to boost attendance at a ballpark. Sounds like a bad plan to me.


Joan Mora said...

We saw a couple of guys like that at the Mavs games last year. Forget their catchy name, but it's the same principle. Not pretty!

Nancy said...

who is going to want to see hefty men get low, low, low, low, low…?

Other men. I don't get it either, but they crack themselves up that way.