I was writing a shopping list across the breakfast table from my daughter. Aloud I listed off, “Tea, butter, toilet paper…”
“I don’t like hearing that word unless I’m in the bathroom,” she said, looking up from her cereal bowl.
“Toilet paper?” I asked. “Why not?”
“It just sounds funny in my ears,” she reasoned.
“It’s not funny,” she said.
Respectfully, I tried to sober up. She’s right. It’s not funny when something just doesn’t sound right in your ears.
For example, Paris Hilton deciding to be charitable and scheduling a trip to Rwanda. Sounded funny to me and surprise, surprise: it didn’t happen. Britney Spears taking parenting classes. Can’t imagine the frustration level of the instructor. I’m thinking she should start with basic hygiene. Didn’t her momma tell her to wear panties in public? Speaking of her mother, something else that sounded funny in my ears. I heard Lynn Spears signed a book deal with a Christian publisher to write a parenting book. And then I listened to the collective banging of heads by wanna-be-published writers who are eminently more qualified.
And how about the Santas in Syndey, Australia, who have been encouraged to say, “Ha, ha, ha” instead of “Ho, ho, ho” because, if overheard by the child’s mother, she might get offended? Sounds more than funny to my ears. Come on, people! Lighten up!
Wonder if Santa would be offended if I had my daughter ask for a years’ supply of toilet paper for Christmas? Now that might make him say, “Ha, ha, ha!”