Thursday, November 15, 2007

Talk funny to me

I was writing a shopping list across the breakfast table from my daughter. Aloud I listed off, “Tea, butter, toilet paper…”
“I don’t like hearing that word unless I’m in the bathroom,” she said, looking up from her cereal bowl.
“Toilet paper?” I asked. “Why not?”
“It just sounds funny in my ears,” she reasoned.
I laughed.
“It’s not funny,” she said.
Respectfully, I tried to sober up. She’s right. It’s not funny when something just doesn’t sound right in your ears.

For example, Paris Hilton deciding to be charitable and scheduling a trip to Rwanda. Sounded funny to me and surprise, surprise: it didn’t happen. Britney Spears taking parenting classes. Can’t imagine the frustration level of the instructor. I’m thinking she should start with basic hygiene. Didn’t her momma tell her to wear panties in public? Speaking of her mother, something else that sounded funny in my ears. I heard Lynn Spears signed a book deal with a Christian publisher to write a parenting book. And then I listened to the collective banging of heads by wanna-be-published writers who are eminently more qualified.

And how about the Santas in Syndey, Australia, who have been encouraged to say, “Ha, ha, ha” instead of “Ho, ho, ho” because, if overheard by the child’s mother, she might get offended? Sounds more than funny to my ears. Come on, people! Lighten up!

Wonder if Santa would be offended if I had my daughter ask for a years’ supply of toilet paper for Christmas? Now that might make him say, “Ha, ha, ha!”


Anonymous said...

I agree with Mia.......toilet paper and breakfast should not go hand in hand!
Great stuff......once again!

Wila said...

If you think Santa is insulting when he says "ho, ho, ho" you must be assuming he is speaking to you!

Lynn Speer's book should be entitled "Messing Up Your Children's Lives Can Be Financially Rewarding."

Getting that off my chest feels good.

As to toilet paper - not having any in the house after breakfast would hurt my ears ("MOM we're out of TP").

Anonymous said...

If your are offended by "ho, ho, ho" then maybe you are a "ho, ho, ho"!

And for the toilet paper I also agree with Mia not during breakfast.

I have found myself waiting to read your next blog. I was a little shocked that you didn't blog anyhting Mon. or Tuesday but when you have a sick kid understandable nothing gets done.